Breaking Up on Facebook
This is a guest post from Susan Preston from 'Susan Can Help Me'. Susan is a Relationship Coach and Mindset Motivator.
Do you remember the song many years ago, “Breaking Up Is Hard To Do?” That song is right, breaking up can be very challenging and now you have Facebook to content with.
When you first were getting into a relationship, you probably couldn’t wait to change your relationship status. So now that the relationship is over, I am sure you can’t wait to change your status once again.
But I caution you, not to just do it hastily as if the other person involved is not where they need to be with the break up, you could really hurt them even more so by changing your status without them knowing that you did.
Tips On Changing Your Relationship Status On Facebook:
Tell Them First:
Don’t break up or ask for a divorce via facebook by changing your relationship status un be known to them. Have a heart to heart with them and tell them that it is over, if possible in person.
Agree:
Talk to the other person involved and asked them when they feel comfortable with changing their facebook status. It is better for you both to agree when the right time to do it is. Be mindful if you have children together, for it is not just about the two of you, but that it is also about them and can affect them in a negative way.
Changing Your Status:
When the time comes that everyone involved, including the children know, then decide how and when you both will change your relationship status.
Instead of going from married to separated, you can go into your relationship status and change it and then change the setting so that only you can see it. This way the whole world will not be notified of you having had changed your status. Instead, on your profile it will not show anything to do about your relationship status. Once all those involved are healing and ready to announce to the world about your break up, then you can later change it to single, etc.
Be Mindful of what You Post:
Lastly, please don’t be writing things about the other person in a derogatory way on facebook or on any other social media platform. It only defines who you are by doing so. Not only that, but the other person may really be going through a challenging time with the break up and I would think that you would not want to hurt them even more so.
Remember, a break up or a divorce does not have to be ugly!
It can be done in such a way that you might even be able to walk away from each other but remain friends.
I bet that Neil Sadaka NEVER imagined that this was going to be something people really needed to be considerate about in the end phase of a relationship!
I was married before the inception of Facebook…and am still married. I never thought about the challenge of changing the relationship status. Hopefully I will never have that challenge! Dropping by from UBC.
Let’s hope so!
I knew this really nice young man who was blind sided. His wife changed her status on FB and all of a sudden he stated getting calls from friends saying they were sorry to hear of the break up. Imagine how shocked he was! This is something that should have been disucssed privately.
Good post and good advice! Thanks for sharing!
Thanks for stopping by!
Great post ,Good tips.Ending a relationship is something that should be discussed privately!
Social media makes it all too easy to share your private business with the world. I don’t think individuals always realise quite how widespread their personal information can go when they rush to tell their friends and the damage it can cause
Wow, I never even thought of that. I guess that says how long I’ve been in a relationship LOL. But seriously, yes, I can imagine there are so many more things to think of. Wow. Great post.
Pretty bad when someone breaks up with you on Facebook – even just by changing their relationship status. Oh my, can’t we keep anything private these days? Thanks for putting these tips out there, Susan!
I’ve been with my husband for so long, this was never a consideration. However, this brings up yet another point I need to address with our children. Not only is the Internet forever, it can be far reaching and far more hurtful than we think to give it credit for. No one wants a relationship to end; it’s especially painful to have it end publicly, and possibly with others knowing before you. Excellent points.
Oh my goodness, I need to give this to my daughters and a few other friends I know!